December Tip of the Month

Informal Conflict Resolution Coaching When people come to us to complain about someone else, it is often difficult to decide if, when, and how to engage in a conversation without becoming a party to the conflict or inadvertently increasing it. There is a way in which a third party can empower conflict participants to deal with their disputes themselves. A conflict resolution coach listens, coaches, clarifies, and facilitates communication while remaining impartial. If someone comes to you to discuss a conflict he or she is in with someone else, the following model can be used as a way to respond: 1) Listen actively while the person is speaking or venting. 2) Name what you think the issues are and highlight the person’s interests (fears, needs, and hopes). 3) Ask the person about his/her goals and objectives for resolution. 4) Explore options for resolution. 5) Coach the person to prepare for the conversation (i.e., when and where to have the conversation, how to address concerns, how to listen attentively, anticipating difficulties). 6) Check in with the person later to see how things turned out.

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